离婚对孩子的 十要：

• Do tell your children that you love them and that  the separation or divorce is not their fault.

• Do reassure your child that divorce is not a sign of personal failure or a cause for shame.

• Do establish consistent patterns of childcare from the beginning of the separation.

• Do let your child continue being a child.

• Do encourage your child to have a continued relationship with the other parent.

• Do establish and maintain a calm. atmosphere and a stable environment.

• Do maintain regular patterns of contact with both parents.

• Do inform your child's teachers about your separation or divorce and about any changes in living arrangements.

• Do include the other parent in important decisions and events in your child's life.

• Do continue to reassure your children that even though you and the other parent are no longer together that both of you will always love and care for them.

离婚对孩子的 十不要：

• Don't have hostile, name-calling fights in front of the children.
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• Don't ask your child to choose whom he or she loves more or with whom he or she wants to live.
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• Don't let your child feel like he or she is being shuttled between parents.
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• Don't use the child for emotional support or as someone in whom you confide your deep, dark secrets.
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• Don't try to hurt your ex-spouse by discouraging visitation.
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• Don't say negative things about your ex-spouse even if you feel strongly that they are true.
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• Don't use your child to deliver messages to your ex-spouse.
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• Don't prevent the other parent's relatives from having access to the child.
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• Don't allow issues of visitation or custody to become linked with those of spousal and child support.
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• Do not prevent your ex-spouse from giving money and gifts to your children, and do not extort money from your ex-spouse in the name of your children.